| hurr I'm a durr KTHUD thump |
[13 Nov 2009|02:33pm] |
Dateline: Viroqua, Wisconsin. So there's this deer. Not a particularly clever deer, as it turns out -- a seven-point, 180-pound buck, fully in season, insanely territorial, bouncing around until it comes across an elk in someone's backyard that's giving him absolutely none of the deference or respect the deer thinks he deserves. The elk's not even acknowledging his existence, and...well, I don't think it's going out on a limb to imagine that the buck gets nine kinds of pissed off, and I guess he takes the silent treatment as the ultimate challenge.
The other end of the story is the gentleman who wakes up and finds his 640-pound concrete elk statue tipped over, antlers broken from the fall. And a dead deer 20 feet away. Know thy enemy, Bambi.
(Note: link has a picture of the assaulted sculpture and the suicidal venison in the distance; might not want to visit it if you're squeamish about natural selection in action. Me, I like critters, and I'm not about gratuitous gore, and this doesn't cross my threshold.)
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| A VERY SEKRIT PASSPHRASE |
[12 Nov 2009|10:04pm] |
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http://journal.neilgaiman.com/2009/11/very-sekrit-passphrase.html posted by Neil
There were 38 independent bookshops around the land who had Graveyard Book parties. The people at Harpers somehow got it down to 11, and they sent them to me to judge the winner. The winner gets me for a signing in December. I watched the 11 videos/descriptions/ photos. I watched them again. I watched them yet again, this time with Lorraine, my assistant, watching too and saying helpful things like, "They are all so good. Whoo. Don't know how you'll make a decision. Look at that! They're line dancing to Monster Mash! And that Death is on stilts, isn't he. Is that a horse? A horse in a store? These are amazing." The fourth time, Woodsman Hans wandered in from the deep woods (where he is making a pond) and watched them too.
Then I made my decision. I called Elyse Marshall at Harpers and told her. "Ah," she said. "I'll have to check with the lawyers to find out if you can do that."
So we wait.
...
Today it occurred to me that in the past when I've had friends on tour, I've often done special "Neil sent me" things, where people who come from this blog get some special free thing, which a) is nice for the people who get the free thing and b) tells the person on tour that people are really coming from the blog. I did it with Thea Gilmore (who is starting a new UK tour next week. People in the UK, go and see live Thea Gilmore, for she is wonderful: http://www.theagilmore.net for dates and venues.) I've done it for The Magnetic Fields, who, incidentally, have a new album coming out on Jan 26th. And then there's the Green Goddess restaurant in New Orleans, where you can mention the "Mezze of Destruction" to tell them you came from here and get sent something wonderful to eat or drink. (It changes, depending on what chef Chris DeBarr feels like making.)
I should do it for Amanda. I called her up and told her.
She called me back. "Beth and I have put our heads together and come up with a code phrase for people from your blog," she said. "So they say it and get a special free thing from the merch table."
"Fire away," I said.
"We think they should come over to the merch table and point to this poster...  ...and say 'That chick in the yellow corset crowdsurfing looks kind of hot. I wonder if she's dating anyone?' And then they get something for free."
I said I thought that was a very bad idea, because people might say that anyway, and it was an awful lot for people to remember. And what if they sold out of that poster early that night?
I said, "What about any variant of 'Neil sent me from his blog?'"
"Absolutely not," she said. "That's boring."
I told her to leave it with me.
And then I stared at this screen glumly, with nothing happening in my head, and real work I should be doing starting to nip at my heels. So I turned to the Oracular Orb of truth at http://www.neilgaiman.com/oracle/ and I clicked on the orb and shook it.
Here is Doug Jones and some strange man it said.
If you go to one of Amanda Palmer's shows on this tour, wander over to the Merch table, and say that you found about it from some strange man's blog. And something good will probably happen. (If they just stare at you, tell them it was me, and this blog. If they keep staring tell them that the chick in the yellow corset in the poster looks like she probably has a really nice boyfriend.)
....
This seemed like a very good cause to me:
Hi Neil,
I am a long-time fan, and have even met you backstage at a Tori show (though that was many years ago!). I am writing to ask a bit of a favor.
About 10 years ago, I appeared on 20/20 with Tori, speaking about sexual violence. Since then, I've stayed close with Tori whose been a mentor of the best kind. I also started a nonprofit, Pandora's Project, that provides support, information, and resources to rape and sexual abuse survivors and their supporters. We operate Pandora's Aquarium, an online support group with more than 20,000 registered members.
Recently, I was named a 2009 L'Oreal Woman of Worth for my volunteer work with Pandora's. I was chosen for this honor from more than 2,500 applicants.
Now, one of the ten 2009 Honorees will be selected as the national honoree through a public online vote. Her cause will get an additional $25,000, and a lot of media exposure. This is the first time L'Oreal has recognized a sexual violence organization, and becoming the national honoree would allow me to shine a spotlight on this issue that affects so many women and women.
Voting is easy - people just need to go to the url below, enter their email address in the box on the right, and click the "submit vote" button. Each email address is allowed one vote, and voting ends November 24.
http://www.womenofworth.com/Honorees/Honoree2009Detail.aspx?nomid=5657c940-425b-47a2-879d-ed3c2d82b56f
I am wondering if you might be willing to send people to this voting link via your (infinitely popular) twitter or blog. I understand if it's not something you can do, but my experience running a small-budget nonprofit tells me it's always wise to ask!
Thank you for taking the time to read this.
Shannon Lambert
I'll plug it happily.
Your correspondent asks "Will you be reading the original version where the wolf actually is killed, and not the 'oh my goodness our kids can't hear about death' version in which they bring him to the zoo?"
I fear she's in error; in the original version, written by Prokofiev, Peter snares the wolf, then convinces the hunters NOT to kill it, but to take it to the zoo.
I've been researching, and that's what I found out too. Wikipedia has a list of changes made in various versions of the story (Disney, for example, had the wolf not eat the duck). But the wolf was always taken to the zoo...
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| Radio! Books! Violin Lessons! Also, a haircut I do not mention anywhere in this blog! |
[12 Nov 2009|06:00am] |
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http://journal.neilgaiman.com/2009/11/radio-books-violin-lessons-also-haircut.html posted by Neil
Went in to KNOW radio station in ST Paul today and recorded an introduction to the NPR MORNING EDITION "Open Mike" piece I've been recording on audiobooks, and heard the edit. Asked them to see if they could find a bit more time in the piece for Audible founder Don Katz, who did an amazing interview and was pared down to about a sentence in the current edit. It'll go out in the next ten days, and as soon as I know when it goes out I'll put it up here. I talk to David Sedaris, Martin Jarvis, Don Katz and veteran audio producer/director Rick Harris in it.
Also popped in to DreamHaven and signed a bunch of books. The piles of books have grown so high, and the administration was proving so hard for Greg now that he is a one-man operation that I'm no longer personalising books there. But lots of signed books now in for the Holidays at DreamHaven's Neilgaiman.net site.
Spent much of the rest of the day driving around, being a dad, taking a daughter and her friend to violin, all that normal sort of stuff, and listening to Martin Jarvis's Good Omens audiobook as I did so. I'm about half-way through it now. It makes me so happy, especially hearing Adam Young read in something sort of close to Martin's Just William voice. Weirdly, I found it easier to hear what I wrote and what Terry wrote than I could if I looked at the text (which I discovered a few years ago, when I proofread the Harper Collins edition). The text is a bit of a blur, after all these years, but listening I'd find myself going, "Me... Terry.... Me in first draft, Terry in second.... Terry in first draft, me in second.... My footnote to his bit.... His footnote to mine..." feeling vaguely like an archaeologist. Even spotted a couple of tiny continuity goofs we should have caught 21 years ago that I may call Terry about and correct in future editions.
(She has an East Coast Tour on right now -
11.12 Portland, ME
11.13 Northampton, MA
11.14 Brooklyn, NY (SOLD OUT)
11.18 Philadelphia, PA
11.19 Falls Church, VA
11.20 Carrboro, NC
11.22 Knoxville, TN.
Go see her in concert. She's a wonder live. Tell her I said hi.)
Hi Neil,
I just read about your event in January, where in you will be narrating Peter and the Wolf. My husband and I are over joyed by this. We will hopefully be bringing our three girls up to see the performance. We did have one question though. Will you be reading the original version where the wolf actually is killed, and not the "oh my goodness our kids can't hear about death" version in which they bring him to the zoo? We are both, obviously, really hopeful that being you, and not afraid to scare children (thank you for that btw) will be speaking the true to the story version in which Peter shoots the wolf and then his dead body is paraded through the town as a trophy.
Thanks for your time,
~Cecily
PS- Do you know if there will be tickets for the event or the reception afterwards? It will be a long drive, and it would be nice to be prepared for either staking out seats all day or having tickets in hand. (We could not find any reservation information on the website)
I'd forgotten - or never knew - that there was an alternative version. The script I was sent is the Zoo version. I'll investigate...
And no, I do not know about tickets. I will find out.
Dear Neil,
Your Web Goblin offered to post photos of Coraline pumpkins, and when they were told this, my 8 and 11-year old daughters decided to make some. Here they are, along with 2 emoticon pumpkins and a turnip.
http://www.steampunkfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/IMG_01521-300x225.jpg
I used them to illustrate a ghost story: http://www.steampunkfamily.com/2009/10/philomenas-fright/
Three of the four of us were Coraline characters for Halloween. (The 11-year old went her own way as Susan Sto-Helit.)
http://www.flickr.com/photos/37435081@N03/4077708519/sizes/l/in/set-72157622616148613/
The Other Mother is the scariest thing I've ever been for Halloween. All the children (even the 4-year olds!) knew who I was, and I elicited much nervous laughter when I offered to sew buttons in their eyes.
Thank you for being VERY SCARY INDEED
I love how many families were Coraline families, this year.
If, like me, anybody else was intrigued by your mention of Kenneth Grahame's other works and wants to read them with a minimum of searching, they'll be happy to know both 'The Golden Age' and 'Dream Days' are available for free on the always invaluable Project Gutenberg:
http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/291
http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/270
Thanks for mentioning them in the first place; I'm always interested in children's lit of that time that has managed to slip through my net.
- B. Bolander
What a good idea. Two very beautiful, gently funny books by the author of The Wind in the Willows. I really enjoyed them, but stylistically they are, well, out of fashion, and will not be everybody's cup of Edwardian tea. Here's a passage that describes the illustration I put up yesterday, as small children steal through the house on a midnight expedition to obtain biscuits (ie cookies, if you are American):
The Blue Room had in prehistoric times been added to by taking in a superfluous passage, and so not only had the advantage of two doors, but enabled us to get to the head of the stairs without passing the chamber wherein our dragon-aunt lay couched. It was rarely occupied, except when a casual uncle came down for the night. We entered in noiseless file, the room being plunged in darkness, except for a bright strip of moonlight on the floor, across which we must pass for our exit. On this our leading lady chose to pause, seizing the opportunity to study the hang of her new dressing-gown. Greatly satisfied thereat, she proceeded, after the feminine fashion, to peacock and to pose, pacing a minuet down the moonlit patch with an imaginary partner. This was too much for Edward's histrionic instincts, and after a moment's pause he drew his single-stick, and with flourishes meet for the occasion, strode onto the stage. A struggle ensued on approved lines, at the end of which Selina was stabbed slowly and with unction, and her corpse borne from the chamber by the ruthless cavalier. The rest of us rushed after in a clump, with capers and gesticulations of delight; the special charm of the performance lying in the necessity for its being carried out with the dumbest of dumb shows.
Once out on the dark landing, the noise of the storm without told us that we had exaggerated the necessity for silence; so, grasping the tails of each other's nightgowns even as Alpine climbers rope themselves together in perilous places, we fared stoutly down the staircase-moraine, and across the grim glacier of the hall, to where a faint glimmer from the half-open door of the drawing-room beckoned to us like friendly hostel-lights. Entering, we found that our thriftless seniors had left the sound red heart of a fire, easily coaxed into a cheerful blaze; and biscuits—a plateful—smiled at us in an encouraging sort of way, together with the halves of a lemon, already once squeezed but still suckable. The biscuits were righteously shared, the lemon segments passed from mouth to mouth; and as we squatted round the fire, its genial warmth consoling our unclad limbs, we realised that so many nocturnal perils had not been braved in vain.
"It's a funny thing," said Edward, as we chatted, "how I hate this room in the daytime. It always means having your face washed, and your hair brushed, and talking silly company talk. But to-night it's really quite jolly. Looks different, somehow."
"I never can make out," I said, "what people come here to tea for. They can have their own tea at home if they like,—they're not poor people,—with jam and things, and drink out of their saucer, and suck their fingers and enjoy themselves; but they come here from a long way off, and sit up straight with their feet off the bars of their chairs, and have one cup, and talk the same sort of stuff every time."
Selina sniffed disdainfully. "You don't know anything about it," she said. "In society you have to call on each other. It's the proper thing to do."
"Pooh! YOU'RE not in society," said Edward, politely; "and, what's more, you never will be."
"Yes, I shall, some day," retorted Selina; "but I shan't ask you to come and see me, so there!"
"Wouldn't come if you did," growled Edward.
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[11 Nov 2009|01:17pm] |
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mood |
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Whats been the best thing that happened today?
I figured out how to fix the faucet without having to buy a new one (unless this doesn't work, but it's a $2 part vs. $100 faucet ... soooo ...)
Who is the last contact in your phone?
Vanessa - because she's a "V" and she's the last person that called me too.
Is your last name longer than 6 letters?
Totally
Has anyone ever called you perfect before?
Not really
Does anyone call you baby?
nope
Last person who laid in the bed besides you?
My clean clothes
Ever liked someone who treated you like crap?
Yes, his name is Peter and he moved to Canada.
What did you do for the 4th of July this past year?
Camped, 4-wheeled, and stuff
Have you ever been called heartless?
Yes, every ex-boyfriend I've ever had
Have you ever liked someone younger than you?
Almost all my boyfriend had been younger than me - even after swearing off younger men in my 20's
What are you doing?
Taking a break from all the cost reports
Is someone on your mind right now?
Not really, just remodeling stuff
Is there someone you will never forget?
There are lots of people I'll never forget.
What's on your mind?
The kitchen sink.
Do you truly hate anyone?
Yes
Who are all the texts from in your inbox?
Dayna, Ben, Gloria, Heather, Laura, Virgina, Joelle, Kendra, and Crazy Crystal
Are you listening to music?
No, but I should.
Do you regret anything from your past?
Trusting certain people
Do you always answer your phone?
Less often than Not.
Someone phones you at 3:00 AM; who do you expect it to be?
Someone drunk
Have you ever been hit on through a text message?
Multiple times
Do you have tan lines?
Nope
Ever kissed someone who smokes?
Yep
Has anyone disappointed you recently?
Nope
Ever cried while you were on the phone with someone?
No
Where was your profile picture taken?
The Anchor
Are you going to kiss anyone anytime soon?
Sure
Giving up on anyone?
I've already given up on them
Who was your last missed call from?
The Boy
Is there anything in your past that you'd like to try again?
College, the first time around.
Have you ever kissed someone with tattoos?
Every day
Have you ever kissed someone whose name started with an H?
Nope
What do you hear right now?
Bob
Is there someone you used to talk to everyday but don't anymore?
Yep
Last December were you in a relationship?
Yes
Is your #2 single?
Nope, she's married.
How's your heart lately?
Still beating
Be honest, who is the easiest person in your life to talk to?
Dayna
In June were you in a relationship?
Yep
What time did you go to sleep last night?
10-ish, like most nights
Is there someone in your life you wish you never met?
Sure is - Tony.
Are you afraid of falling in love?
Nope
Has a best friend ever done anything behind your back?
Almost all of them.
Has anyone said you have changed lately?
Nope, even though I have.
Do you remember who you liked on New Year's?
Yep
Is there a person in your life that you know you'll never forget?
Didn't I answer this already?
The boy/girl you truly care about the most needs you at 3 AM, would you go?
Oh sure, for a price >;)
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| Leaves on the wind |
[11 Nov 2009|02:16pm] |
Ah, the November gaming rush. Brilliant time of year. I'm going to give Modern Warfare 2 and the finally-released-for-PC Force Unlimited a pass for a while, opting instead for Dragon Age: Origins -- which I'm enjoying the hell out of so far. If you've read anything about it, odds are they've been raves, so let me just nod in assent: it's from BioWare, the people who brought us some of the best CRPGs out there, and the closest analogue one can find to describe this would be that it's a Baldur's Gate -- with all the story and gameplay and richness that implies -- for the modern gaming market. And if the idea with that fills you with joy (or just intrigue), get it now. Its mechanics and systems and conventions will all seem familiar, but pleasantly so, and that's what you need to know most.
On the other side of the killer-rig stick, I found myself playing Gratuitous Space Battles and...you know, this game snuck up on me and infiltrated my mind in a hurry. Simple premise: you build a fleet of ships to defend after waves of incoming attacks, you configure and allocate and deploy the ships, give them orders, then allow them to engage -- at which point you're powerless, forced to just sit back and watch the AI crews do the best they can with what you've given them. And as you watch you start bouncing between Serenity's Operative yelling "Somebody fire!" and Star Trek's Nero: "Fire everything!" It's a bit of the digital addictiveness of a tower-defense game and a ton of customizability and eye-candy, and with enough real strategy that I'm still...not as far along in the campaign as I'd like to be, let's just say that. (And the automatic ship names are customizable -- I've replaced them with a thousand names from the NaNoWriMo generator, so a good number of ships are named after Space Mutiny protagonists and theoretical members of the Wu-Tang Clan.) Like Dragon Age: Origins, if this is the sorta thing you think you might like, you'll probably love it (I'm looking at you, ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) kansel01). But don't take my word for it. Try the demo.
In other news, today cannot end soon enough. And tomorrow can wait a while.
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